A burly, bearded lumberjack hauling a massive log, begging the world to chill while the banner screams the immortal truth: “STOP! MY WOOD CAN ONLY GET SO HARD.” Pure 70s-style innuendo wrapped in pine-scented glory.

Perfect for campfires, job sites, hardware store runs, or anywhere you need to explain your situation without actually explaining anything. Printed on soft vintage green ring-spun cotton that looks (and feels) like it’s been through a few seasons in the woods.

Key Features:

• High-detail retro print that hits like fresh-cut pine
• Ultra-soft cotton that’s comfier than flannel
• Sizes S to 2XL

Sizing